ABCs of Handbags

Is your toddler’s first word "Gabbana" instead of "Dada"? Do you dream of a future where they can spot a fake Fendi from across the playground? Welcome.

Other kids are learning to stack blocks. Yours is learning the proper way to store a vintage Chanel.

Introducing the ABCs of Handbags, the foundational text for the discerning toddler. This isn’t just an alphabet book; it’s an investment in your child’s future… social standing. Prepare your little one for a life of impeccable taste, one luxurious letter at a time. Because while potty training is temporary, style is forever.

This Style Primer Features:
- 26 Handbag Lessons: From Alligator to Zips, each page is a masterclass in fashion history and material desire.
- Minimalist Design: Chic, muted tones that won’t clash with your neutral-toned nursery aesthetic.
- Actually Educational: Yes, they’ll actually learn their ABCs. We just hid the lesson behind layers of calfskin and satire.
- Parent Notes: Filled with witty asides and pronunciation guides you’ll pretend you don’t need.

Inside This Style Bible:
- A is for Alligator: The skin so exclusive, it has its own security detail.
- B is for Birkin: The bag that costs more than a college education (and is arguably more useful).
- C is for Clutch: For holding exactly two mints and a single, very important credit card.
- H is for Hermès: The only orange box that matters.
- Q is for Quilted: The pattern that screams "old money," even if you’re just "new parent."

Perfect Gift For:
- Fashion-forward parents with a sense of humor
- That friend whose baby has a better wardrobe than you
- A baby shower where the registry is all Gucci
- Toddlers destined for a corner office (or a reality show)
- Anyone who understands that "investment piece" is a love language
- Your future grandchild, as a family heirloom

What Stylish Parents Are Saying:
"He pointed at a woman in the store and shouted 'F is for Fendi!' He’s 2." - Tiffany, The Hamptons
"My daughter now refuses to carry her snacks in anything but a 'vintage' lunchbox. Thanks." - Chad, Beverly Hills
"The only book that’s managed to hold her attention. It’s the shiny hardware." - Sloane, Greenwich

Warning: May cause toddlers to critique your handbag choices, demand juice in a dust bag, refer to their toys as "their collection," and develop a sudden allergy to polyester.

Beneath the satire, this is a beautifully designed, high-quality alphabet book that makes learning fun for both parent and child.